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ThanX for making my life more colourful =')

  

 its 07.05 pm. Yesterday im having so much FUN with my brother, Auzie, Imad, Aish n Andi. im bringing them to the beach. Eating ABCs n Pisang goreng. Hoping that yesterday was happening everyday. hoping that yesterday's feeling will remain in myself. hoping that that feeling doesnt fade away... Ya Allah... what happen to me today? why am i feeling like i want to lock myself in a room. Its all start when seeing my cousins comment at FB , inviting me come to picnic this sunday. im thinking to come o not. Thinking that my another cousin (cousin?? huh? former cousin mybe) would be there. am i still angry to her? I just dont knw. My mom doesnt allow me to go. but im remembering my aunt's kindness to me. If mom were still here, things doesnt be too complicated rite nw. I miss u mom (sanah, my foster mother) 

  Why i am me??? what am i destined to be? what will happen if i just perished from this world??? is everybody's life being easier enough???? 

  All i knw is just being thankfull to Allah, He had planned everything with a REASON. i knw... Astagfirullah... i really2 need someone to talk rite knw... wish my friends was here. wish i can share everything. hwever, they r having their xam, dont wanna burden them with my silly pob. GUD LucK everyone! 

From Forrest Gump Movie = life is like a box of chocolate, u never knw what u get.

                                         

what is my destiny? Ans= ill figure it out myself.

Salam... 

i wish i had a sister like Natrah Zainal to talk to. i envy ur life Natrah. Miss u~ ='((

Malaysian University English Test

Alhmdulillah... yesterday was a success. i had do my best for MUET. ^^ i dunno why as the exam finish, i feel like one heavy stone had fall from my shoulder. soooo... relieve! padahal, on Nov still have another xam for MUET. haih... as xam finish yesterday, I, straight away went to the town to celebrate it with Amalina. hahahahaha... Also, im happy to meet several friends from there. they r so good n friendly to me. glad to meet them. =)

Last nite my fren n I, went to c. Hanijah's house,my biology tcher in my secondary school (st anne). it was fun spending our time with tchr gossiping n eating enjoying every moment we had. Tchr cook for us, Laksa Penang (yummy!) n there a so many stories we shared last nite. till my mom was getting angry becoz it was dy late. i knw she was anxious becoz it was late n im driving at nite 4 da first time. (chill mom! just labuan bhaa... dis is not KL)  somehow, Alhmdullillah.. im still ALIVE. =) gonna prepare for next xam. Aja2 fightin!

Our steps

Beach at Tanjung Aru

Speechless when starting to write. but hv a lot of things want to express, i just dunno hw to arrange every words coming out from my mind. let my finger lead me. heee... Today was obvious. Evening was fun going outside, jog with my cuzzie. our destination is Tanjung Aru beach, the distance of our journey today becoming more2 further as we planned. heeee... Today's journey/ as i can say odyssey (hehe) was fun and challenging. ive challenge myself to be bravely explore the Tanjung aru area. at first i felt scare n worried. no one can be trust in this world, we do not knw what will happen to us. so, ive taken more precaution on myself by being to scared to explore my own kampung. (paranoid) hahahaha.... but, time had change me into a person that is more brave maybe n strong. So, today n the past few days, id manage to take a walk outside, farther than my home, to explore the nature n take a deep breath of a fresh air. sometimes it is good to go outside n let urself forget all about ur life. Every moment i spent today was hard to describe its feeling. i feel good. 

Alhmdulillah....

BTW!!!!! my MUET is on tue. haihhh... whats gonna happen. id just practicing on my speech. brush up my speaking skill, so that i wont stammer on that day. at least, i can say something, maybe "good morning". haha. ive have no high expectation on that day. just hoping to do my BEST! insyaAllah~ my aim? Shoot beyond ur aim. u knw what i mean =) Pray for me. may luck always with me. 

Nite. (wink)

24 hours

             Feel sleepy+penat. Ptg tad sgt best dpt g jogging dgn cuzzie in the vacinity of tanjung aru. =) better than going with ____. kdg2, feels like cuzzie belah mama lbih best. walaupun umur dorg lbih muda, tap xda prasaan hasad dengki n sengketa ntara kami. So, i feel much better be with them. Jog ptg2 mmg best trutama bila rmai2 dgn cuzzie. hurm... xtually, i just dun really care what ppl say. they cn say i did not mature enough since i still hanging around wif them. I just dun care! usually uni student like me will oni stay at home, being with their friend at the same age, hang on the phone with bf, going out enjoy life n etc. but, for me, im just being me. being what i feels like i can laugh, cry, angry n sad  naturally. i like being me. its just, not im abandoned my frens. but, nw, most of them still studying, while im on my holiday. Lgpun, kdg2, feels like im not a fun person, mybe doesnt hv a sense of humor. ya ka??? mybe... =(

             ok, change topic, cmna nieee??? MUET??? apa yg akn brlaku. bila practice, stammering. haih... but insyaAllah. ill do my best. tad bc article psl kerjaya seorg doc. i not sure whether im capable in handling all the test/obstacle when choosing a career as a doc. but, im sure Allah always knw whats best for me. i accept Qada' n Qadar. If i am not destined to be one, i knw that's the best for me. Though i want it very bad, but if Allah doesnt give it, hv to accept it with an open heart. mybe ada kerjaya yg lebih baik kat luar sna utkku =) kerana Allah lbih mngthui sgala galanya.

            (Yawnnnnnnn) nmpaknya, katil telah memggil... hehe... ngantok pla. ive wondering, hw cn a person, stay up till 2 o 3 days working 24 hours?? can i???? datz one more facts dat ill must swallowed. One routine being a doc ==''. mybe ill be one of cullen family sooner o later. (joke) nmpaknya, mkin bsarlah eyebag nnti. Fuh! time being unfair! is it?? o im being unfair to myself. alar.... admit ja la, aku yg byk buang masa. From nw on... (repeat) ehem! from nw on, ill decrease playing, onlining, sleeping, dreaming n eating (ehh????) time. most of the time should be allocated for study or revising. (alarrr.. xkan la tym2 cuti gak... huhuhu)  not very punctual xtually, but ill try. k, papai... beta hendak bersemayam aka tido. (sori byk sgt preaching, hv a very gud nite)

Morning is nice :)

Alhmdulillah.... its morning again. n it is saturday! hurm... 16th oct?? OMG!!!! 2 more days before im sitting for MUET xam! shoot! am i prepare enough??? gonna practice in front of the mirror. hurm... hope can do my best for speaking test dis tue. ArrGGhh! cant speak very well, but ill try my best. AJA2 FIGHTIN! 

Today, nothing much to do. mybe going to the town, shop shop shop. =)) heeee... last nite was , hw im gonna says?? last nite chat lama sgt dgn best fren. he's got pob. ksian kat dia, Allah continuously testing on him. hope he'll be strong. be strong my fren coz ill always be there, lending on my shoulder for u =). Gud luck for ur final, hope u cn do ur best. xtually u r stronger than me coz u manage to go through these days. dun worry my fren, Allah had promised u the best in the future. be patient.

sumtime, what happen to ur fren, we should take it as a moral value. this is Allah's guidance to make our life better. Allah's test is to makes us remember him, n ask for help only from him. tap kdg2 bila dah dberi mcm2 ujian, org ttp syirik. reminder to myself too. ==''

k, gonna stop here~  vacuum ruang tamu tugas pgi ini... huhu

Will i be?

Will i be???

 Feels like sumtime doesnt hv cnfident in myself. seeing my friend study abroad taking med was making me curious. am i gonna be?? can i?? hurm... ppl say, kalo nak amik med kena btul2 confident. kalo on off on off cmna arrr?? tap bila dfkir fkirkan, inilah impian yg tlah lama trsimpan sbnrnya. mnjad salah seorg Doc. best dpt bntu org lain. My wish i could be one. impian tersimpan, berkat doa usaha n tawakal, pasti dapat. insyaAllah... Amin~

TV fanatic?

wot! wot! Vampire diaries!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Best gila nak MAM! =D dah smpai season 2. im urging ppl to watch! lgi best dr Twilight. Jom tgk... mmg best. Tgk on9, sbb x tercatch up kat TV. ^^ glad ada on9 watch. =) phew~ 

This is life...

Lama x update blog. hurm... Yesterday hd been the toughest day, knwing smting dat really2 heartbraking to u. when ppl say they hated u, wht would u do? n if dat ppl is ur childhood friend. she's hurting u so badly with her sarcastic word without realizing that, each of her word she's wrote makes my heart crash into pieces. apa yg tlah ku lakuakan smpai dbnci sgt2??? Nw i realise, ive grown into one phase where, id say that "wow, hw tough life are actually." This test from ALlah is one of the toughest.  nw i realise in this life ppl tht u really appreciate n love would stabbed on ur back n turn on u. Real life is outside the school world where u hv to be independent, standing as a strong person even a earthquake cant shakes u. Haihhh.... this life obstacle have push me hard enough till im about to fall. however, its Family who always be there , giving me an inspiration, giving me strength to stand up n fight back. Yeah! aku cukup kuat utk mghadapi smua nie. bru sikit.... mybe besar lgi dugaan d luar yg mnunggu. lets win this game n AJA2 Fightin! Gonna study for MUET . Xam on next week. ThanXx for my friends for being there though some of them are being a "fair weather friend".